Lost Then Found
by obsidian glass
Summary: Preseries. It's always up to Dean to bring Sammy back, and that's what he does. Sam 12 Dean 17
1. Chapter 1

Lost Then Found

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: As much as I wish I did, I don't own Supernatural.

Warnings: Mild to moderate swearing.

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Seventeen-year-old Dean Winchester woke with a start. He looked over at his clock, 4:30 blazed out at him. He rubbed his hands over his face, unsure why he was up. The apartment they were currently staying in was strangely quiet. His father was out on a hunt and had been for several days. That explained the absence of heavy breathing but something else was wrong. Dean silently padded across to his brothers room, pushed the door open only to be greeted by an empty bed and a piece of paper with the words 'I'm Sorry.'

"Oh fuck," The young hunter said running his fingers through his hair.

0o0o0o0o0o0

Sam looked up into the already fading night sky. It was almost dawn. His feet were starting to hurt; he'd been walking for several hours along the same dusty highway. He stifled a yawn, and refocused his vision. It was amazing what over twenty-four hours without sleep could do to someone. He hoped to God Dean hadn't found him gone yet. He wasn't as far away as he would like and he certainly wasn't in the mood for a half hour lecture followed by pretty much being stalked for the next few months. As if he'd been cursed, Sam heard the soft purr of the Impala speeding up the highway.

Sam crouched down as low as he could, trying to avoid the thousands of headlights shinning in his direction. No such luck. The younger turned on his heels and ran away from the incoming vehicle.

"Fuck! Sam wait!" The elder jumped out of his car and ran after his younger sibling. He grabbed his brother around his waist, pinning him against his chest. "Easy Sammy," he grunted out trying to restrain his thrashing brother. _Fuck Sammy, when did you get so bloody strong?_

Sam fought against his brother's hold, but he always got tired of fighting. He felt an unfamiliar stinging sensation from behind his eyes. Slowly two tears fought their way out, followed by sobs that racked his body. The younger stopped fighting against his brother then fell back into his arms.

"Shhh Sammy, it's okay, it's okay."

He let Sam turn into his chest and cry onto his shirt. The elder let his hand fall onto his baby brothers back, and rubbed it gently, up and down, up and down. Dean waited until the tears had slowed before pulling away from the embrace. He placed his hand underneath his brother's chin and lifted it gently. Using his thumb he swept away all the tears gracing his brother's cheeks.

"I'm sorry," Sam managed to croak out.

"It's okay," Dean said, wrapping his arms around him again, trying to offer as much comfort as possible.

The elder let Sam cry into him for a few more minutes before he gently lifted him up and carried him towards the car. He grabbed a blanket from the trunk, tucked it around Sammy and jostled him into the passenger seat.

The ride back felt longer to Sam than the hours of walking he spent earlier. _Just great, freaking wonderful. _The younger closed his eyes and lent his head against the window. _I'll be lucky if I get more that two frigging seconds alone in the next six months._ _Why the fuck am I so stupid? Did I really think I could lose Dean for more than a couple of hours?_

The older hunter turned and looked at his sibling for what had to be the hundredth time. He looked as if he was starting to doze, all huddled up in the corner. He sighed slightly as he turned 'round the last bend before their apartment.

"Mother Fucker," Dean moaned, eyeing his father's truck parked in the driveway. He walked around the car to the passenger seat, only to find his brother was now in a deep sleep. Sighing again he lifted Sam out and got as far as three steps before –

"- Dean what the…?"

Dean let his gaze meet his fathers. "In the morning Dad," he said nodding towards Sammy.

John nodded, slightly confused and turned to follow his sons through the front door.

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	2. Chapter 2

Lost Then Found

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: As much as I wish I did, I don't own Supernatural.

Warnings: Moderate swearing.

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Dean headed towards his bedroom rather than Sam's. The older hunter continued fully aware that his father's eyes were following him. The younger adjusted his position in his big brother's arms, his head now resting on the elder's shoulders.

Dean gently placed him in his bed and turned to walk away, just as Sammy started to murmur. Instinctively the younger's hand shot out gripping the Dean's shirt, fingers fastening around the fabric. It was amazing that in that one gesture several years seemed to shed off Sammy's face. He looked more like the nine-year-old who had come to him every time something had happened, whether it was insignificant, or something where he would almost literally need to move mountains. The older hunter smiled slightly, pulled up a chair, and casually let his finger run through his brother's hair, coaxing back into a deeper sleep. His eyes lingered over his little brother's face. _What's going on with you Sammy? _

"Dean…" His father's voice pulled him away from is sleeping sibling. "What the fuck happened? Did something get him?"

Dean walked out of his room straight to the kitchen before responding. "He…he ran away."

"What the fuck? Why?"

"How should I know?" Dean asked growing increasingly frustrated.

"You need to know! Where were you?"

"I was fucking sleeping. The kid can be pretty quiet when he wants to."

"Well are you going to find out?"

"Find out what?"

"Why he left?"

"No, I'm just going to let the kid work himself into a frenzy and fret for a few months because of whatever the reason he left." he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Dean turned his back on his father and walked towards his room.

"Where are you going?" John asked, almost yelling.

"Where do you think?"

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_Did I shut that door? _For the second time in less than twenty-four Dean pushed open a bedroom door to find its occupant not there. "Hey!" Sam was on the window ledge, one foot sticking out, eyes overbright with held back tears. _Fuck, Sammy. _Calmly the elder walked over to the window and gently pulled his brother down.

"Sammy…" Dean sighed, and then pinched the bridge of his nose.

"…Sorry…I just… heard you and Dad fighting…about me. I'm so sorry, it's all my fault."

"Hey," the elder said sitting down next to his brother, "what's your fault?" Silence greeted Dean followed by a small shake of a head. "C'mon Sammy, you know you can tell me anything. I promise I won't get mad."

"I…I can't."

"Yeah you can. Look I promise I won't tell anyone." _What is going on Sammy? _Dean sighed. "Do you want me to beat it out of you?" He berated himself inwardly when he saw he little brother's eyes start to tear up again. He awkwardly patted the top of Sam's head. "Sammy?" he gently prompted.

"Dad. You always take the blame every time I screw up. My mistakes are your mistakes… Everything thing I do wrong you get in trouble for. I…just didn't want to burden you anymore."

Great, so this was why his little brother had tried to run away. He had these unreasonable thoughts flowing through his head, telling him he was a burden…that everything was his fault. Time to start gluing the pieces together and repair the damage that Sam's mind had managed to inflict upon itself. Dean took some time to collect his thoughts before responding.

"Sammy, I don't want to hear you say that, or hell, even think that crap again. I can promise you that no matter what happens, and no matter what you do no one thinks of you as a burden." He paused, trying to maintain eye contact with his younger sibling. "Listen Sammy, you're my responsibility, and sure that can mean that sometimes I have to take the heat but I wouldn't have it any other way. The only time you really screw up is when you pull your little 'run away' stunts like this. And God, you know Dad, nothing is good enough for him, there's always room for improvement. You got all that?"

The younger nodded in response.

"Sam, you have a voice. Use it."

"But…are – are you sure everything you said is true?"

"Yeah kiddo, I'm sure," he replied, affectionately ruffling his hair. "You look like crap by the way, when did you last sleep?"

"Thanks, and like half an hour ago"

"I meant for more than a few seconds genius. C'mon get in," he said pointing towards his bed, "I really don't want to deal with a sleep deprived adolescent in the morning."

Smiling Dean sat down and watched his brother begin to doze. No matter what happened he would always be there to bring his Sammy back in more ways than one.

The End

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